Loved.

Thanks a lot for humiliating me outside in public in front of so many people. Thanks for always ruining my Christmas week. Thanks for making me feel so loved.

Yup, love. Soooo much love. Your priorities are wrong. You choose inanimate objects over a real deal human being over here who is of blood relation to you.

Thanks for giving me this cold shoulder. Youre always ruining my Christmas week and our fights are always about money. For 4 consecutive years, we always fight. Fight, fight, fight, fight.

Fuck money. The same bloody reason why we always fight. Fuck money, fuck money, fuck money.

I want to be a fucking millionaire and throw thousand dollar bills at your face showing you that I've made it, I've made a stand on this world.

I'll show you that I'm capable of things more greater than this.

Insomnia

Hello, haha. It's 5.46 now, and I've just hung up a 5hour skype call.

SLEEP.
The place where you can runaway from your problems, the place where it disconnects you from the world temporarily. Sleep is important right? For my age, my recommended hours are 8. Apparently, my body clock is so screwed that I can only sleep for 6 hours and I won't feel tired anymore. How sucky.

Most of my friends should be sleeping now, It's 5.48. Come on, haha. Maybe I should sleep too. Maybe I should. Or should I stay awake all the way? I don't know. I'm so tired.

Anyway, so I went out with Baoer and Marcus tong today to do some christmas shopping. Cabbed over to Marcus' place then cabbed back to woodlands to meet baoer. Didn't really buy anything. So, afterwards, I went to suntec to meet my mom to get some stuffs for friends too. And we bought the sexiest garrett's popcorn! So happy hehehe. Then we ate a really late dinner at about 915. Then we headed back home.

Anyway, it's already past 12 but, happy belated dong zhi jie! :) . It was yesterday ( 22/12 ) and most of my friends had gatherings with their families and all to eat tangyuan. Haha, my family didn't even know such a festival exist. So I suggested going chinatown to eat. But they didn't reply.. So, guess we'll be going on like eve of Christmas :) .

So, ya.. Blogging got me disconnected from my surroundings. Deeply immersed in thoughts of what I should type and all. It's like 5.55 now. So that sucks.

I'm considering making DD my main blog, but I'm not sure if I should! Maybe I should, maybe I shouldn't.. I don't know, I'll have to see about it later. Gahaha.

I love the peacefulness of the night where there's no noise but just me typing my random rants onto this blog post. It feels good to have like the whole night to yourself. :)

Anyway, I shall go off now. :) Maybe I'm going to sleep haha. Okay anyway, nights. Bye!

Love?

“Have you ever been in love? Horrible isn't it? It makes you so vulnerable. It opens your chest and it opens up your heart and it means that someone can get inside you and mess you up. You build up all these defenses, you build up a whole suit of armor, so that nothing can hurt you, then one stupid person, no different from any other stupid person, wanders into your stupid life...You give them a piece of you. They didn't ask for it. They did something dumb one day, like kiss you or smile at you, and then your life isn't your own anymore. Love takes hostages. It gets inside you. It eats you out and leaves you crying in the darkness, so simple a phrase like 'maybe we should be just friends' turns into a glass splinter working its way into your heart. It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It's a soul-hurt, a real gets-inside-you-and-rips-you-apart pain. I hate love.” - Neil Gaiman

Love is hard to define. Love may seem like one thing now, and it may be something else later. Love has a lot of meanings, and it's just how you define it in your own perception.

Gahhaa, I've been through 2 years of plain ignorance of what the person is doing with his life right now. I have been through 2 years of ignorace, pain, and guilt. He probably doesn't remember me anymore, but I do. Gahahhaa.

I'm moving on. I can't think of you my whole life, I have been waiting for too long. Should already forget you by right now. I guess, I have to.. So.. Good bye, so long. For now.

Dillemma

What do you do when your heart's in two places?

I know I shouldn't have said some things, and I know some things were meant as my own secret. You are so alluring. You have this strange presence that makes me want to get to know you better. But yet, I know I shouldn't.

Good evening, readers. I'm back blogging.
A year has passed and I'm still on s-anctifiedhearts.bs What an accomplishment. This blog has stood by my side through thick and thin. A year, a year. I can't believe 365 days has passed. Actually, more than 365. Haha. Started this on 28/11 I think, cant recall.

I'm itching all over, I wonder if it's my chicken pox. I have not gotten them yet. Am I too strong or is it just because I'm too healthy? Either ways, it's good. Haha! But yet, getting chicken pox at an older age is bad.

This sucks, this month, or these few months in fact, has been a roller coaster ride. I can't tell any longer what's wrong and what's right. I am losing my sense of direction.. Sometimes I just want to go in to trance and forget about this world.. Forget about all these pain and suffering that I have been going through.

It's 10 o'clock. Maybe I shouldn't blog anymore. Have I been updating my life recently? I've got a job. I doubt I've mentioned that on my blog. I've lost important people in my life the past few months starting from September. I've got my results too. Oh, VP of drama club too. What else, what else.

I'm trying to summarize my life up in a few sentences but it seems like it's not working. I tend to forget things. Or is it that my life hasn't been anywhere near interesting where I can blog about it? Maybe, maybe.

I'll try to blog more often nowadays, and I promise this is not an empty promise. I really have to learn how to start blogging continuously everyday.

Speaking of blogging, I have a new blog. If you guys follow me on twitter, like literally follow and actually read my tweets, I have been talking about SH and DD. This is obviously SH. DD's my new blog. Haha, try finding out what DD is an acronym for. Good luck with that.

Nights readers, this was a really short update. -/ Luv.

12/12/11

Mark my words, you'll never fucking forget this day. 12/12/11.

Fucked up

It's been so long since I ranted with vulgarities, but who the fuck cares. I'm
FUCKING pissed off now. whatever I fucking do, you all have a bloody fucking restriction for me. I never have any fucking freedom. Oh, thanks a lot. You care so much for me til I'm not appreciative? Ya fuck you guys. You keep telling me I'm rude when you don't know how much Im fucking suffering. It's not my obligation to be shouted at every morning you know. What the fuck. Ignoring little selfish brats. You are all so fucked up. Thanks a lot for making my morning so horrible every fucking day.

_l_

All I wanted was to have a little more freedom. Thanks a lot now I know how much you trust me. Selfish little ignorant brat.